Because the night belongs to Gus (and Flo)

January 4, 2011 • Posted in blindness, Flo, parenting a child with special needs, Uncategorized by
A sample of Brian’s work: Portrait of a haenyeo (female diver) on Jeju Island, S. Korea.

I asked Flo once why she wanted such a large family. Her response made it into my memoir, Long Time, No See:

“Well really,” she answered, “I always wanted just two children.” Her first-born was my sister Bobbie; the second, my brother Doug. The perfect little family.
“What happened?” I asked.
“Hmmmm,” she said, taking a long time to think it through. She finally answered with a laugh. “Too many parties, I guess!”

I am the youngest of seven, and all my siblings (hey, isn’t that a daytime soap opera?) made it to Chicagoland this Christmas to party with Flo. Some highlights:

  • Brian Miller’s new book. Remember the post about my sister Bev’s trip to see her son Brian in South Korea? The Village Across the Sea, a collection of Brian’s stories and photography of life on Jeju, was just published. Bev and her husband Lon attended the book launch virtually, thanks to Skype. A review in last weekend’s Korea Times describes Brian’s photography: “Miller, an English teacher and photographer, explores the diverse and fading themes of an area in transformation.” From what everyone tells me, the photos are striking. See for your self at Brian Miller’s web site.
  • Lydia Hoover’s new hat.I came home on Christmas Day to find a phone message from Lydia, one of my sister Cheryl’s 11 grandchildren. “I love
    Lydia wearing the red hat I made for her.

    That's Lydia with the scarf I made for her.

    the hat you made me, Aunt Betha,” Lydia’s feathery voice came drifting out of my answering machine from her Little House in Minnesota. I’m wearing it all day today. I really love it. Thank you, Aunt Betha.” Sounds corny, I know, but I really did think of Lydia with every stitch. Her sweet message confirmed what I knew already: it was a labor of love.

  • My new scarf. Hanni spent her final days as a Seeing Eye dog leading me over and over again to the knitting store down the street. the very, very patient owner of Loopy Yarns oversaw my work, assuring I’d have Lydia’s hat in the mail before Hanni retired and I left to train with a new dog. All that time my brother Doug’s thoughtful and hard-working daughter Marsha was busy at home in Indianapolis…learning to crochet! I think of Marsha every time I wear the warm, colorful scarf she made me for Christmas. Which means I think of her every day.
    Me wearing the scarf Marsha made me.

    That's my niece Marsha's handiwork I'm wearing.

    Thanks, Marsha!

  • The new line on my resume.My sister Marilee Amodt and her daughter Jennifer met up with us at Hackney’s one cold afternoon while they were in town, and bartender Billy Balducci knew exactly how to warm us up. Jen is getting married in March, and before the night was over, she asked if I’d officiate the ceremony. Note to Jennifer: totally understandable if you were just caught up in the moment. You won’t hurt my feelings if you take back the invite. But
    Jennifer, Marilee, and Beth

    That's bride-to-be Jennifer on the left. That green concoction is a Green River soda. Marilee's in the middle, and moi.

    if you and Brian Ulen are serious about having me do the honors…I’m there!

Somehow amidst all that Finke family frenzy, we squeezed in a visit to our son Gus in Wisconsin over the holidays, too, and were delighted to learn that the new CD player he got for Christmas has rekindled his affection for…punk music! So if you’re wondering what to do with all those old Patti Smith CDs you transferred to your iPod over the holiday break, leave a comment here. I’ll be happy to send you Gus’ address.

Kathy On January 4, 2011 at 11:22 pm

Love the red hat.

bethfinke On January 5, 2011 at 7:10 am

Aw, shucks. Thanks, Kathy! Sounds like Lydia loves it, too, I smile every time I think about her with that red hat on her little head.

Bob On January 4, 2011 at 11:28 pm

Was Harper with you at Christmas, too?

bethfinke On January 5, 2011 at 7:06 am

Not sure if Patti Smith is still playing, but I’ve sure heard a lot about that book of hers – heard her interviewed on NPR, “Just Kids” was reviewed well, and then it won a National Book Award. A friend sent me a Maureen Dowd review: , “Patti Smith’s memoir “Just Kids” is achingly beautiful….It unfolds in that romantic time before we were swallowed by Facebook, flat screens, texts, tweets and Starbucks.”
I’m eager to read “Just Kids” now, sounds like Patti is speaking my language. But here’s the irony: rather than walk over to the library to check it out, I’m going to download it from audible.com and then, who knows, maybe I’ll blog about it. Guess I’ve been “swallowed by Facebook, flat screens, texts, tweets and Starbucks”!

bethfinke On January 5, 2011 at 7:08 am

P.S. Will be interesting to find out if Patti Smith is the one reading the audible.com version…

Maria On January 5, 2011 at 1:40 pm

I know you’re going to think I’m fabricating this, but I’m not. I had two photos published back in the late 70″s. One was the Springsteen one I told you about already. The other was one of Patti Smith, no joke, taken at CBGB’s in the Village. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of CBGB’s? It’s closed now, but back in the day, it was a popular “dump” people used to frequent to see “punk” bands. The Talking Heads and Patti Smith were among the performers. Anyway, the same person who freelanced and included my Springsteen photo, freelanced for another more local paper at the time, and he did a review of Patti Smith and included one of my photos with that article. How funny! Way to go, Gus! Punk rock, really? The night really does belong to Gus (and Flo).

bethfinke On January 5, 2011 at 7:11 am

Of course he was! Remember that post about Harper being raised in a college dorm? Like my sister Bev says, Harper is a “party animal!”

Maria On January 5, 2011 at 1:41 pm

Sounds like your Christmas was “idyllic” also! The fact that all those people could unite for the holidays is something else. That was quite a feat! You must have been ecstatic. Your family is so diversified and interesting (and, yes, you are included in that). How old is Gus now?

bethfinke On January 7, 2011 at 10:03 am

Hard to believe, but Gus is…gasp…TWENTY-FOUR years old. My sister Bobbie’s reaction when I told her this? “Yikes!”

Bride & Groom On January 6, 2011 at 5:20 pm

What a wonderful holiday! I am so happy I was able to make the trip to the Windy City and see many relatives I haven’t seen in a few years. You even rolled out the perfect Winter Wonderland scenery. Brian and I thought long and hard about who was best to marry us – its kind of a big deal! You were the first person to come to mind – well spoken, award winning author, long lasting marriage, baseball fan, you even offered the perfect segue to the ask! We are looking forward to having you be a part of our special day, see you in March!!

bethfinke On January 7, 2011 at 9:44 am

“Kind of a big deal” is right! I am oh so flattered – and so surprised –you’d ask me, Jen. Remember back when “Long Time, No See” first came out and I asked you to read aloud from it for my presentation at UrbanThink Bookstore in Orlando? That was before I figured out a way to “read” print.
We’ve come a long way, baby!
Imagine the talks I’m having with mike now about what technology to use at your wedding…last night while discussing what earpiece I might need, how these short range wireless connectivity standards work, I wondered out loud how a Bluetooth might coordinate with the dress I plan to wear. “Are they actually *blue*?”
What fun this all is. Thanks for the honor, Jen and Brian!

Marcia On January 7, 2011 at 9:50 am

I loved reading this blog and the photos. I received my bithday card from Auntie Flo yesterday. She enclosed a long letter about all the family coming and going during the holidays. I could tell that she’s a happy lady.

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