Myrna– and Henry’s — Legacy

May 21, 2018 • Posted in careers/jobs for people who are blind, memoir writing, writing prompts by

Ten years ago my downtown Chicago memoir-writing class got so full that the Department on Aging started a lottery. A retired college professor named Myrna had been attending that class for years, and when her name wasn’t chosen in the lottery, she approached an organization in her own Chicago neighborhood to encourage them to sponsor a writing class there.

Photo of Myrna.

Myrna Knepler

Myrna Knepler helped me stretch my wings as a teacher.

Her neighborhood organization said yes, and it’s largely because of Myrna that I found the confidence to lead five memoir-writing classes every week now.

Myrna Knepler died Sunday night, and in her honor, I’m sharing a story about her that dates back to the time I assigned “in-laws” as a writing prompt.

Myrna’s mother-in-law Hedwig is on the left. That’s Henry, Hedwig’s son and Myrna’s husband, on the right. And that’s baby Elizabeth being held by Hedwig. Taken in 1962.

Clever and self-aware, Myrna was one of the very, very, few memoir-writers in my classes who was courageous enough to write about her mother-in law. “Although she had proved both mental and physical sturdiness, she was thin and bent in a way that made her seem fragile and untouchable,” Myrna wrote back in 2012. “Certainly her life experience was beyond anything I knew, in some ways so terrible I was afraid to touch it.”

Myrna’s Husband Henry was only 16 when he said goodbye to his mother and father in Vienna and boarded the Kindertransport (children’s transport), the effort that saved 10,000 Jewish children from the Holocaust. Henry’s father died in the Auschwitz concentration camp. His mother — Hedwig — survived by hiding in an unheated cabin in the Vienna woods, owned by an anti-Nazi family who sheltered her there.

Hedwig would not reunite with Henry, her only child, until he was 24 years old. Myrna would get to know Hedwig Knepler a decade later, after marrying Henry. From her essay:

Moreover, I sensed the tension between her and my husband, her son. I, his new, much younger wife, wanted above all to please him. He loved his mother, but was troubled by what seemed to be her almost obsessive concern for him, a concern more appropriate to the mother of a young boy, than to a balding assistant professor in his late thirties.

Myrna wrote that her conversations with her mother-in-law were awkward until Myrna and Henry had their first daughter, Elizabeth.

Then for the six months between Liz’s birth and Hedwig’s death, talk was easier,  focused on our mutual love for and wonder at this new creature, the grandchild she never expected to have.

Hedwig died in 1962, leaving Myrna and Henry to sort through a box of letters Hedwig and Henry had exchanged before and after the war. The letters were written in German (a language Myrna did not know well) and stored in their attic for years. The only time Myrna and her husband Henry opened the cardboard box together, they closed it up right away and put it back on the shelf. The material inside was too painful for Henry to read.

Henry died in 1999, and before his death, when he was too ill to deal with the letters himself, Myrna realized that they were now her responsibility. She unpacked nearly one thousand pages of letters — all typed single-spaced and to the edge of the page — and started sorting them by date to donate to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington, D.C. In exchange, the museum would translate and make copies for Myrna and her daughters.

The translated letters trickled back to Myrna over a span of six years, during which time Myrna was busy penning her own stories for the memoir-writing classes she was attending — one at the Chicago Cultural Center, and the other in Lincoln Park, sponsored by The Village Chicago. “It would be an understatement to say that the memoir groups have been an important part of her life for the past several years — she’s always loved stories, and being able to write and share her own stories has been so meaningful to her,” Myrna’s youngest daughter Annie wrote in a note to me yesterday. “We are also so grateful to have all of those stories written down.”

Myrna took years pouring over the translated letters forwarded to her from the Holocaust Museum and was finally able to piece together stories of how her mother-in-law helped a brother immigrate safely to Argentina. She read heartbreaking details of her mother-in-law’s attempts to help her mother and aunt, who were already interned. They did not survive. Myrna’s mother-in-law wrote about her own struggles to support herself. About how she starved. How she helped save others. About how, in the end, some of the people she saved ended up helping her.

Thanks to Myrna, the original letters exchanged between Hedwig and Henry are now preserved in a vault outside of Washington, D.C., where scholars can access them.

Myrna spent the last year of her life gathering personal stories Henry wrote for his children. Working with her daughter Annie, Myrna shaped them into a memoir. Leaving Vienna, edited by Myrna and Annie Knepler, will be published by Golden Alley Press later this year.
So here’s to Myrna, A remarkable woman who taught me — and continues to teach us all — so much.

Carol Abrioux On May 22, 2018 at 12:18 pm

Very touching. It told me more about Myrna than I ever knew.

Hank On May 22, 2018 at 12:28 pm

Sorry for your loss, Beth. Interesting story. Thanks for sharing.
My brother and I also paid a visit to the US Holocaust Museum a couple of years ago with our collection of memorabilia from our parents. The archivist translated everything for us, which was very interesting. I have to admit, my ulterior motive was to get these papers I could hardly understand out of the house but now I have a copy of everything plus a few legal documents ceding the rights all in a neat three-ring binder. No good deed goes unpunished. Smile.

Sheila A. Donovan On May 22, 2018 at 12:28 pm

I got the chills while reading about Myrna’s family. I am so glad that she was able to share it with the world, via the Holocaust Museum. I’ve just learned a bit more about Myrna. I look forward to reading Leaving Vienna, when it comes out. Hugs to Myrna’s family.

Anne Hunt On May 22, 2018 at 12:39 pm

Thank you for sharing Myrna’s background! One more time, I am reminded that “every person has a story!” I recently decided to return to the memoir writing group after a time away, and tell my stories. Myrna’s story made me realize how grateful I am that my own family (all of my grandparents and great grandparents) were immigrants who were fortunate to find ways to come to this country, find work, and raise their families in safe communities. I look forward to writing their stories as they were told to me, along with my own adventures, as part of my legacy to my children and grandchildren.

Lois Baron On May 22, 2018 at 12:43 pm

Sitting in LaGuardia airport getting this very sad news. Glad I was able to speak with Myrna and exchange emails before leaving Chicago. She’s the reason I on memoirs too. She knew she was dying and was calm and at peace.

Annelore On May 22, 2018 at 2:53 pm

Ahh Beth, I can hardly believe that Myrna is gone. She was the first one in our downtown class to make me feel welcome, even registered me when I was out of the country – she was a woman with a giant size heart, exceptionally kind and loving and wise. I’ll keep the memory of her warm smile forever. And… without your Memoir class Beth, I would have never met Myrna – she truly left her mark on my heart1 Thank you.

Mary Ann Schwartz On May 22, 2018 at 2:55 pm

Myrna was a colleague of ours at Northeastern Illinois University. She was a wonderful teacher and friend and we will miss her laughter and perceptive insights.
Mary Ann Schwartz and Dick Brewer

Marilee On May 22, 2018 at 4:13 pm

Thank you for sharing some of Myrna’s stories. Very grateful that you two met and supported each other!
I look forward to reading her book.

Maureen Lugg On May 22, 2018 at 5:25 pm

I’m sorry to hear of Myrna’s passing. I remember her from class many years ago at the Cultural Center. I’m glad she was able to pass this history on, and that it will produce a book. Blessings to the family.
Maureen

Deborah Aronson On May 22, 2018 at 5:28 pm

Gosh, this story gave me chills!! Thanks so much for sharing.

Andrea Kelton On May 22, 2018 at 7:33 pm

Good-bye, Myrna. I admired you and your many talents—teaching, painting and writing. Thanks for your friendship.

Don Rose On May 22, 2018 at 10:07 pm

I knew both Myrna and Henry since the mid-fifties–independently, before they even met. In the mid-60s by coincidence we became next-door neighbors in Hyde Park, for nearly 20 years. My two children and the three Knepler kids grew up together. Later we became neighbors in Lincoln Park and maintained a long-lasting friendship. First Henry’s sad parting, now Myrna–who comforted me after the passing of my partner Judy James in 2110. Such sorrow.

Marion Karczmarm On May 23, 2018 at 7:10 am

I knew Myrna from Memoire Group in Lincoln Park but I never knew her history. Thanks for enlightening me. She was a very warm and interesting person, a significant presence in the community. Her passing is very sad.

P.S. I miss you and the memoire group very much.

Bev On May 23, 2018 at 1:59 pm

What a gift to have all that history preserved for generations to come.

Beth On May 23, 2018 at 4:50 pm

Thank you all for so many fond memories of Myrna –and of Henry, too. I received the news about Myrna shortly before leaving Chicago yesterday on a scheduled trip to New England. So sorry to be away while all are sitting shiva for our dear Myrna, but while here with dear friends in New Hampshire I am thinking fondly of my friend Myrna, too. Thank you all for the messages, I will see that her daughters and grandchildren get them when I’m back in Chicago.

Renee Harrison On May 28, 2018 at 8:03 pm

I will miss the camaraderie that Myrna and I shared with mutual friends from the Village as well the exchanges about our families after services at Makom Shalom.
She was such a giving and gifted person and always seemed to be at the forefront of the latest. Her vitality will be remembered. Thank you for being Myrna.
My condolences to Ellie, Liz and Annie and your wonderful family that I came to know.

Paula Strupeck On May 28, 2018 at 9:40 pm

Thank you, Beth, for this beautiful slice of Myrna’s slice. I’m sorry for your loss. I feel blessed to have known Myrna when I was a grad student. Her words, her thoughts, her spirit, her intellect, her sparkling eyes…have left a legacy in my heart and mind. It had been years since I’d seen or spoken with her. Thank you for sharing your experience with Myrna. It warmed my heart with memories. May her memories be blessings for you.

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